How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
