and my herpes radar will keep us safe
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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