do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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