i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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