What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize
