Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
operation harelip BJ is a go
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
