I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Randomize