You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize
