How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize