I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
