hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Sext me about skeletons
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
