Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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