I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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