I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
