who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
