I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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