you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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