these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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