Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
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