two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
