ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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