There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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