You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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