His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
