youre lurking in front of me
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
40s are totally the cure
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
