Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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