Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
