You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
