Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
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