I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
