bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
