I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
