No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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