my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize