Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
