I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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