I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Drunk is not a location!
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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