so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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