Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
