The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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