Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize