I smell stomach acid.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
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