Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
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