I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
