God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
