I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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