Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
