he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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