Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
