went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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